Hole-in-the-Wall Guide: 2009

METRO's favorite out-of-the-way and under-the-radar places in the Twin Cities

Rooster’s BBQ and Deli, 979 Randolph Ave., St. Paul, slings authentic Memphis-style ribs.

Image credit: Photo courtesy METRO.

By: METRO staff |   June 2009   |  From the print edition

Times are tough. But don’t tell that to a hole in the wall.

A hole in the wall is always hanging on by a thread. Its budget is always lean, its staff always skeletal. This year is no different. If a hole in the wall weren’t too busy saving its own neck day in, day out, it would poke its head out into 2009 and wonder, “What the hell is everyone complaining about?” Life is always hard for a hole in the wall, and it’s hard in return. Some folks call that “character.” For a hole, it’s just a living. That’s why we love them. And that’s why it’s getting harder to put together this guide.

Every year for the past three years, we’ve scoured the town for the best holes in the walls. (Hole in the walls? Holes in the wall?) Most holes have been around a long time and, sadly, it’s their nature to close more often than they open. Especially these days. So it feels like we’re running out of hidden gems that our readers didn’t realize they were missing.

But of course we’re not. Cataloging holes is like counting stars: There’s always another one nearby and you’ll never catch them all. This year we surprised ourselves by coming up with dozens of holes we hadn’t covered before (to read our previous lists, I urge you to visit metromag.com). To organize them, we identified our favorite neighborhoods in the metro to find holes. We dug deeper this time around, and got a little dirtier in the process: One café on West Broadway looked promising until a prostitute propositioned us in the parking lot. We left one St. Paul restaurant off the list upon learning that it was the site of a recent multiple homicide; we’re all for exploring the city from every angle, but we draw the line at crime scenes. We also probably left off a hundred businesses that belong on this list. (Let us know about them at letters@metromag.com.)

What is a hole in the wall, exactly? Every year we try to answer that question, an activity that, three years in, has proven impossible and will hereby be abandoned. A hole in the wall is like art and love: It can’t be defined, only experienced, and you’ll know it when it happens. Is that too tall a pedestal to carry something called the Wienery? Does Al’s Liquor really fit in among life’s highest pleasures? Maybe not. Maybe these places don’t really fit in anywhere. Maybe that’s the whole point—that the best stuff never does. All I know is, if there was ever a time to overstate the case for the wee, the hidden, the hardscrabble, it is now.

Just don’t tell that to a hole in the wall.

Downtown White Bear Lake

White Bear Lake’s downtown delivers all the wholesome charm and historical magnetism you might expect from a 150-year-old resort community and former gangster hideout. Ample free parking-—no quarters or dangerous parallel parking maneuvers necessary—and pedestrian-respectful drivers make patrons feel welcome at every corner. Every good citizen starts the day properly groomed, so make Benny’s Barber Shop  your first stop. An adult cut will only set you back 15 bucks, and original fixtures, wood paneling and taxidermy will conjure memories of the lake cabins of your youth. Head around the corner to Ban Thai , whose awards for authentic Thai cooking draw a busy lunch trade. A few doors down, dark and intimate Evans Music  reminds you, “If you want to sing the blues about the economy, you need a guitar, an amp, and a p.a. system.” Satisfy your after-lunch sweet tooth a block over at Grandma’s Bakery , where you can almost see Aunt Bea presiding over the rotating pies. Across the street, the classic Prohibition-era 617 Lounge  is perhaps the perfect bar, as genuine a speakeasy as you’ll ever encounter. As home beckons, visit the Cup and Cone , a timeless ice cream shop, for a twilight treat.

Benny’s Barber Shop; 4758 Washington Sq., White Bear Lake; 651.426.1082 // Ban Thai Restaurant; 2186 3rd St., White Bear Lake; 651.407.8424; banthaionline.com // Evans Music; 2182 3rd St., White Bear Lake; 651-429-0236; evansmusic.org // Grandma’s Bakery; 2184B 4th St., White Bear Lake, 651.762.2900; grandmasbakery.com // 617 Cocktail Lounge; 2185 4th St., White Bear Lake; 651.429.7111 // Cup and Cone; 2126 4th St., White Bear Lake; 651.426.1498; cupandconewbl.com

St Louis Park

If time has forgotten some of St. Louis Park, then we have time to thank for leaving well enough alone. Many pockets created in the post-World War II growth of this inner ring community seem unchanged. The non-descript beige exterior of Al’s Liquor  belies its colorful history: Built in 1926, in the middle of Prohibition, Al Lovass’s basement acted as the city’s most notorious “party room.” Squinting from the mid-morning sun as you enter the dark interior, today you’re greeted by the old-timers sitting at the bar as the bartender explains it all to someone on the phone: “We’re old-school here.” Later, head to Lake Street, where the Roller Garden  rink will remind you of your youth in all its sweaty, skin-kneed glory. Loud youngsters celebrating birthdays have skated under the watchful eye of the polka-dotted rooftop dinosaur since 1943. Then roll on over to Beek’s , “The King of Pizza,” where the aroma of their delicious thin-crust pizza has been irresistible for more than 50 years. Watch carefully, or you’ll roll right past a small, tasteful sign- sandwiched between two others loudly stating, “CATERING” and “DENTIST.” --It beckons you to SLP’s newest hole in the wall, the hard-to-find-but-worth-the-effort Four Firkins  beer store.

Al’s Liquor; 3912 Excelsior Blvd., St. Louis Park; 952. 922.9940 // The Roller Garden; 5622 W. Lake St., St. Louis Park; 952.929.5518; rollergarden.com // Beek’s Pizza; 6325 Minnetonka Blvd., St. Louis Park; 952.929.0095 // Four Firkins; 8009 Minnetonka Blvd., St. Louis Park; 952.938.2847; the fourfirkins.com

Mall of America, Third Floor

To clarify: The Mall of America itself is not a hole in the wall. You can see it from space. There are, however, some easily overlooked nooks, and even a few crannies, down the darker corridors and non-Rollercoaster-adjacent real estate within the capitalist monster. Scattered through levels one and two, for example, is the occasional Hawaii Crabs kiosk—if there’s a better place in the Twin Cities to get moderately priced hermit crabs with shells painted to resemble SpongeBob SquarePants, we’d like to hear it —and Magnet Max, a one-stop shop for novelty fridge-stickers. But the largest and oddest assortment of holes is located on the forgotten third level, where a deadly combination of escalator fatigue and altitude poisoning has resulted in a vortex of the weirdest stores you’ll ever see. It’s here that you’ll find Vååse , an outlet that advertises discount-happy Buddhas in the front but specializes in large, novelty swords and other stabbables in the back. You’ll also find Corda-Roy’s Originals , where they peddle bean bags so large they double as beds (but, strangely, no corduroy). Keep walking—you’ll pass A.C.E.S. , the flight simulation alcove; Oxynate , an all-purpose oxygen and massage bar; a couple candy stores; a Matchbox car dealership; and Professor Bellows Old Time Photos , for all your sepia-toned Wild West photo needs. Eventually you’ll find your way to Col. Muzzy’s Texas BBQ  for some finger-lickin’ good eats. Don’t worry, they’ve got wet-naps, but do one better and get yourself a ShamWow; you’ll find one at As Seen on T.V. , just down the hall.

Mall of America; 60 E. Broadway, Bloomington; mallofamerica.com

Central Ave NE

Nicollet Avenue in south Minneapolis gets all the press (and streetlight banners), but fans of grungy, authentic ethnic eateries would do well to redirect their appetites toward Northeast’s Central Avenue, an urban thoroughfare choked with Mexican, Indian, Middle Eastern, Thai and every cuisine in between. To the south, just off Broadway, your global gastro-tour begins at the quintessential American eggs-and-browns diner, the Ideal . A few blocks north you’ll find the best international market in the neighborhood, Patel Groceries, specializing in Indian food and Bollywood video rental; as well as the only Pakistani restaurant in town, Pak Zam Zam . On 23rd, don’t miss Crescent Moon Bakery , home to what might be the world’s best (and possibly only) Afghani pizza. Walk one more block up the road and suddenly you’re in Little Mexico: Chiapas closed last spring, leaving Adelitas  as your best bet for burritos, as well as Durango Bakery  for scrumptious, not-too-sweet pastries. And on 25th you’ll find the king of all holes—if a multi-million dollar hummus empire could rightly be called a hole in the wall—Holy Land . Make sure to hit the dinner buffet, or try the chicken gyro (weekends only), one of the city’s best sandwiches.

 Ideal Diner; 1314 Central Ave. N.E., Mpls.; 612.789.7630 // Patel Groceries; 1835 Central Ave. N.E., Mpls.; 612.789.8800 // Pak Zam Zam; 1839 Central Ave. N.E., Mpls.; 612.706.1941 // Crescent Moon Bakery; 2339 Central Ave. N.E., Mpls; 612.782.0169; crescentmoonfoods.net // Adelitas; 2405 Central Ave. N.E., Mpls.; 612.789.2526; adelitasmexicanrestaurant.com // Durango Bakery; 2418 Central Ave. N.E., Mpls.; 612.706.7950 // Holy Land Bakery & Deli; 2513 Central Ave. N.E., Mpls.; 612.781.2627; holylandbrand.com

Cedar-Riverside

Once the home of Mary Tyler Moore, the area surrounding Cedar and Riverside avenues is one of the city’s most diverse—a weird and colorful mix of University students, recent immigrants and West Bank hippies young and old. Where the two streets meet, you’ll find Keefer Court Bakery , home to a case of Chinese pastries—most under $2—including our favorite, the super-flaky butter cream cone. Half a block down Cedar is the Wienery , a quintessential hole serving up its titular hot dogs, their meatless counterparts and an assortment of griddled goodies. If you’re on the hunt for avant-garde theater, head toward Bedlam Theater  not far from the Cedar-Riverside light rail station. Housed in a former Italian restaurant, it now serves the city’s most cutting-edge theatrical performances, as well as its best new dance night, the aptly named Bomp!, on the last Friday of every month. There’s also a bar at the theater, but for real drinking, Palmer’s   is your place. It’s a certified dive where you’ll be wise to heed our simple description: strong drinks. Come bar close, head across the street to Mediterranean Deli , serving up gyros, burgers and fries until 2:30, or to the Hard Times Cafe , where, judging from the rough clientele and cheap menu, every year is a recession. They close at 4 a.m. and open again at 6 a.m.

University of Minnesota

Every derelict apartment in Dinkytown is rumored to have once been inhabited by Bob Dylan, so it isn’t surprising that the neighborhood still holds plenty of underground allure. Al’s Breakfast  is almost as legendary as Mr. Zimmerman himself—whom we’ll gladly stop mentioning now—thanks to its scarcity of stools and abundance of excellent, no-frills breakfast fare. (We humbly suggest the Summer Special, served year-round.) Down 14th Avenue, vinyl enthusiasts will find a kindred spirit behind the counter at Jerry Raskin’s Needle Doctor , purveyor of all things record-related. Two used bookstores also line this block: Cummings , home to two Boston terriers, a pair of cats, one bird and innumerable titles; and the Book House , less organized and equally overwhelming. On Fourth Street, lunch awaits at Uncle Franky’s , an offshoot of Northeast’s favorite hot dog joint, tucked inside the Dinkydale Mall (more accurately titled the Dinkydale Hallway). Or head across 35W to Santana Foods , a restaurant-cum-convenience store where the deep-fried cheese curds rival the State Fair’s. On the other side of campus, hoof it to Stadium Village, where your trek is rewarded at Washington Avenue’s Hong Kong Noodle , an unassuming front for killer Chinese dishes.

West Broadway/Robbinsdale

Let’s be honest: There’s a reason why West Broadway in North Minneapolis doesn’t get the foot traffic it did when, say, Friedman’s Department Store  first opened its doors (more than a century ago). But anyone avoiding this neighborhood because of its seedy reputation is missing out on one of the city’s most exciting neighborhoods. Friedman’s alone is worth the trip: Home to more shoes than any other store in the state, this sneaker-lover’s haven has been a community staple since before West Broadway was a community. Once you’ve got shoes on your feet, hoof it (or drive; it’s a hike) to El-Amin Fish House  for lunch. They serve seven kinds of fried fish, plus great fried chicken, filling a hole in the street’s appetite ever since the owners of Harold’s across the street were arrested for trafficking drugs. Further down Broadway, don’t sleep on Pair of Dice Pizza , a former Dairy Queen that holds a well-earned reputation as the street’s best Minnesota-style pizza. (Don’t know what that is? Go to metromag.com.) Continuing along Broadway, you’ll eventually flutter into Robbinsdale—a hole in the wall unto itself—and instantly be greeted by the St. Petersburg Restaurant , whose vodka bar is the best argument for diplomatic relations with Russia we’ve ever encountered. A few blocks down is Bill’s Guns , the area’s top gun range (you may want to go here before the vodka bar). Finish your West Broadway tour with a walk through historic downtown Robbinsdale, home to Hackenmueller Meats , the world’s most descriptively named butcher shop, where the employees still wear paper hats and know most of their customers by name.

Friedman’s Shoes; 400 W. Broadway Ave., Mpls.; 612.522.2362; friedmansdeptstore.com // El-Amin Fish House; 2221 W. Broadway Ave. Mpls.; 612.588.9622 // Pair of Dice Pizza; 2715 W. Broadway Ave., Mpls.; 612.522.3423; pairofdicepizza.com // St. Petersburg Restaurant; 3610 France Ave. N.; 763.587.1787 // Bill’s Guns; 4080 W. Broadway Ave. #1; 763.533.9594 // Hackenmueller Meats; 4159 W. Broadway Ave.; 763.537.4811

West Seventh

We could’ve picked any span of West Seventh, one of the holey-er stretches of road we’ve ever traveled, but the section between Randolph and the Xcel Center has a critical mass of truly great dives. Cases in point: Joe and Stan’s Café  ain’t pretty (picture a half-finished basement with some beer signs on the walls), but what it lacks in looks, it makes up in friendly service and unpretentious crowds. If crusty beer bars aren’t your bag, try the Day by Day Café  for the best hash browns in the Twin Cities, or the Glockenspiel , a real-deal German restaurant/beer hall where schweinshaxe, a.k.a., pork shank, is king. Make sure your car’s good and dirty when you roll through the area so you can wash it in one of the bright blue stalls at the ancient West 7th Street Car Wash . Complete your tour de holes at Cossetta’s . The pizza-slinging side of this legendary institution is no hole, but its small Italian market, where the cured meats hang from the ceiling, is an oft-overlooked specialty foods gem.

Seventh Ave E/North St. Paul

Start at Sidewinders , a card room/karaoke bar located in one of the many ancient brick buildings that line North St. Paul’s main drag. Outside the bar, a drunken septuagenarian will cackle at you through her Kool mild—something about how the meat raffle ended years ago. Ignore her and enter a world where wannabe gangsters of every ilk gather around worn card tables to sip brown liquor through straws and play Texas Hold ’Em. Order a round of brown liquor for you and your friends. (Note: Do this crawl with a large group of trusted associates.) Hit the stage with your pals and butcher “Don’t Stop Believing” by Journey. Then wander down the street to the Polar Lounge , a brightly lit hovel the size of a two-car garage. Note the dentally challenged clientele and the awesome polar bear painting hanging above the front door. As your gang leaves the bar (after more brown liquor, of course), reach up and attempt to remove said painting, which, unfortunately for you, is nailed to the wall. When the bartender yells, “What the hell you doin’, guy?!” sprint over to Neumann’s , a circa 1887 biker bar that claims to be the longest-operating watering hole in the state. The first thing you’ll notice is the large, live bullfrog sitting in a pool in the front of the bar. Next you’ll notice that the place is wallpapered with stuff—Hamm’s Beer signs, taxidermy, black-and-white photos of Neumann’s through the ages. Finally, you’ll realize that you are too drunk to be in a bar where the mascot is a live bullfrog. Leave immediately for Roddy’s , a surly old sports bar that serves Heggie’s—the best frozen pizza in the known universe. When you’re sufficiently stuffed, take a taxi home and thank your lucky stars that the Polar Lounge’s bartender didn’t get his hands on you.

Sidewinders Nightclub, 2573 7th Ave. E., St. Paul; 651.773.8867 // The Polar Lounge, 2549 7th Ave. E., St. Paul; 651.779.8708 // Neumann’s Bar, 2531 7th Ave. E., St. Paul; 651.770.6020; neumannsbar.com // Roddy’s Bar & Grill, 2541 7th Ave. E., St. Paul; 651.779.8689

Bayport

Bayport could give two shits about being a charming St. Croix River-side settlement. You want charm? Go to Stillwater, its neighbor to the north. They’ve got streetcars and antiques shops up the ying-yang. Bayport, on the other hand, is too busy being a real city where residents use phrases like “give two shits” and “up the ying-yang” while clocking in at the Andersen Window factory at the edge of town. But its blue-collar attitude and plain-Jane exterior betray Bayport’s secret stash of soulful dives. Places like Not Justa Café , known for its “messes” (choose-your-own-ingredients scrambles), and La Cocinita , the best Mexican restaurant you’ve never heard of (try the corn bread bake). Places like the tiny, ugly strip mall on its south end, where you can buy a wicked-good baguette at Bread Art  and a just-plain-wicked firearm at Border Bay Goods and Guns . Make it a night trip and visit Woody’s , the townie bar whose bowling alley walls are covered in colorful North Woods scenes, courtesy of local muralist John J. Reipas. If you want to get in good with Woody’s regulars, spout off about those fancy Cabernet-guzzlin’ aristocrats up in Stillwater. You’ll get nods of approval and maybe even a free shot of Jägermeister.

Not Justa Café, 177 3rd St. N., Bayport; 651.275.8900 // La Cocinita Mexican Restaurant, 338 5th Ave. N., Bayport; 651.439.2795; lacocinitarestaurante.com // Bread Art, 110 3rd St. N., Bayport; 651.351.1475; breadart.biz // Border Bay Goods and Guns, 106 3rd St. N., Bayport; 651.430.8048 // Woody’s Bar & Grill, 109 3rd St. N., Bayport; 651.439.5666; woodysbargrill.com

Randolph Ave

Tucked into the West Seventh neighborhood of St. Paul is a three-block stretch of Randolph Ave. that feels like the land that time—and the rest of the city—forgot. The homes are old and they look it. Same goes for the businesses. The crusty but loveable Dannecker’s Grocery and Liquor  has been around since 1912 and is worth checking out for its vintage exterior signs. Leitner’s , a small, 100-plus-year-old garden center, is a neighborhood favorite thanks to its friendly staff and thoughtful setup (they organize their perennials by bloom time). After picking up this year’s crop of impatiens, head down to the wood-paneled Spot Bar , which has been kicking (and kicking people out) for almost 125 years. Even newer places like Rooster’s BBQ  and Accordion Heaven  feel like they’ve been on this strip forever. Rooster’s slings authentic Memphis-style ribs, and Accordion Heaven—with its wall of colorful Planet Squeezeboxes—is Mecca for polka nerds.

Dannecker’s Grocery and Liquor, 793 Randolph Ave., St. Paul; 651.222.7328 // Leitner’s Garden Center, 945 Randolph Ave., St. Paul; 651.291.2655 // Spot Bar, 859 Randolph Ave., St. Paul; 651.224.7433 // Rooster’s BBQ and Deli, 979 Randolph Ave., St. Paul; 651.222.0969; roosterbbq.com // Mahler Music Center (a.k.a. Accordion Heaven), 907 Randolph Ave., St. Paul; 651.224.6943; accordionheaven.com

Midway

With a name like Midway, the intersection of University and Snelling always feels like a rest stop and never a destination. That is, unless you have a thing for holes, which Midway boasts aplenty. Urban Light Music , one of the last remaining refuges for vinyl collectors, is still the place to go for local (and well-known) DJs. Down the street, Big V’s  bar serves neighborhood folks by day and college students by night, lured by local bands and a cheap cover. Around the corner, Fasika Ethiopian Restaurant  offers the best in food you are supposed to eat with your fingers, although Checkerboard Pizza , the red-and-white-checkered storefront across the street, is also in the running. (Get the “King Me” pizza or the meatball sub). Farther up Snelling is Ginkgo Coffeehouse , whose tiny stage is well known to many in the local folk scene. If a piroshki, or Russian hamburger, is more your thing, head down University to the Russian Tea House , which offers lunch in the half-of-a-house eatery, with borscht available on Fridays. Last but not least, Midway hosts creative and cheapskate paradise, Ax-Man Surplus Store , where Huggy Jesus sits next to a limb-less doll resting atop a bucket of doorknobs. A three-year-old shopper recently put it best: “Whoa, stuff!”

Urban Lights Music 1449 University Ave. // Big V’s; 1567 University Ave. W, St. Paul; 651.645.8472 // Fasika Ethiopian Restaurant; 510 Snelling Ave. N, St. Paul; 651.646.4747; fasika.com // Ginkgo Coffeehouse, 721 Snelling Ave. N., 651.645.2647; ginkgocoffee.com // Checkerboard Pizza; 511 Snelling Ave. N., St. Paul; 651.645.0414; checkerboardpizza.net // Ax-Man Surplus Store; 1639 University Ave., St. Paul; 651.646.8653; ax-man.com // Russian Tea House, 1758 University Ave. W., 651.646.4144